Relationships: Am I Being too Demanding?

Q&A: "Am I Being too Demanding?"

Dear Jennifer:  

I am finally beginning to feel at peace and have joy in my life. After years of being the ‘martyred healer’, I have taken control of my energy and set new boundaries for my relationships. A dear friend I have known for more than 20 years says I am being too demanding and has ended our friendship. While I am sad that she has chosen to do this and regret the loss of this friendship, I am also confused about her reaction. Instead of being happy for me, she has rejected me but I don’t want to go back to being the way I was before, even for her.

Jennifer’s Answer:  

When we shift our energy we set new energetic parameters for all of our relationships. This doesn’t mean that we demand more of others but it does set new requirements for them to be able to participate in our lives. If you have been the martyred healer in your relationships, one of these requirements is that others stop taking energy and power from you because it is no longer available to them. Your friend’s anger is not surprising, as she has lost a power source and wants to get it back. She will use emotions to do this because they have worked before.

You are dealing with her fear about what she has to become in order to have a relationship with you. It’s a big step for her because she has to be able to mirror your new energy and it is too much for her to process at this time. She is unable to align herself with your new energy without making significant changes and that is what she is rejecting. Since you are the source of this new potential, thinks that if she ignores you, she won’t have to face it. But she will, with another teacher. 

Since you have set an intention for joy and peace, anyone who is unable to resonate at that level of energy will feel very 'uncomfortable' around you.

While she says you are being ‘demanding’, she is reacting to the new requirements (she can feel them as demands) that your new energetic boundaries and the new paradigm of joy and peace have created for your relationships. In order to be friends with you now, she has to raise her own energy to meet you at that place and she is not able to do that. So she has two choices here, to raise her energy to be in your new space with you or reject you. She has chosen to reject you and there is nothing you can do about that. The truth is she feels threatened by your new energy and is afraid that she cannot meet that standard so she will reject it, and you.

To make yourself feel better in this situation you can see her rejection as confirmation that your new energy is fully in place and can be felt by others. She will probably not be the only person who will react this way, everyone who is used to your old energy paradigm will have to make the same choice, to join you at the new level or reject you. 

Please don’t take it personally because it is not about you, it is about them and their energy. Maintain the new boundaries because they bring you joy and know that with each person you release you will invite another to take their place and soon your life will be full of people who resonate with, respect and honor your energy because it matches theirs and you can enjoy more harmonious relationships with people who don’t’ think you’re demanding at all.

-

About Jennifer Hoffman

Jennifer Hoffman is a celebrated intuitive, author, channel, spiritual teacher and is best known as the author of the weekly Enlightening Life newsletters, with more than 2 million weekly readers, and the Internet’s oldest and most widely read spiritual newsletter. Jennifer provides life intuition, spiritual wisdom and business savvy to a client base that includes celebrities, business and industry leaders, professionals and other clients from  more than 50 countries.

Jennifer is a life long intuitive whose unique gifts allow her to read energetic fields and instantly know a client’s soul purpose, karmic path and life lessons, and what is required to bring their energetic vibrations into alignment with their soul’s desire for wholeness in body, mind and spirit. She is recognized for providing highly accurate and focused intuitive and channeled guidance to raise energetic  vibrations and create a clear path to a joyful, fulfilling life.

In early 2004, after a visitation from Archangel Uriel, Jennifer began to write the weekly Enlightening Life newsletter, whose readership now exceeds 2 million people around the world, is featured on some of the Internet’s largest websites and is translated into more than a dozen languages.  A prolific writer, Jennifer’s messages  have been described as powerfully transformational, healing and exceptionally insightful and timely by many of her readers.

Jennifer’s unique life history has been an inspiration to her clients. As a young child she had a paralyzing illness and her complete recovery, after five years of near total immobility, was called miraculous by her doctors. Then as a young teen she was hit by a car and miraculously walked away from the accident. Jennifer was told that she had a mission here which would be revealed to her at the right time. After graduating from college Jennifer began a career in technology during which, in her words ‘all I wanted to do was be a corporate vice president.’ But the Universe had other plans and after experiencing six layoffs in less than eight  years, Jennifer decided to focus on sharing her spiritual gifts as she was guided to.

Her writings have been featured in many publications around the world. In 2005 her series on the Shift in Consciousness received Planet Lightworker magazine’s Series of the Year award. She is a featured writer in some of the Internet’s most popular spiritual sites and her writings are translated into dozens of languages. Her popular classes and seminars are widely attended and the list of newsletter readers grows daily.

Her work has helped many people connect to and understand their spiritual connection, find peace on their life journey, learn how to use their own spiritual gifts and create powerful transformation in their life. Jennifer has worked with thousands of clients with her intuitive readings and coaching programs and trained people to use their spiritual gifts and abilities in empowering, life changing ways.

Jennifer is available for speaking and teaching engagements, Email Jennifer for details.

About Enlightening Life OmniMedia, Inc.

Enlightening Life OmniMedia, Inc. is a spiritual community focused on bringing a wide variety of guidance, information, teaching and healing resources to everyone who is searching for guidance, solutions, possibilities and transformation. We are a resource for the seeker as well as those who may have answers, bringing together those who are holding a light and those who are confused, afraid and disempowered. Our goal is to empower the individual and the world for when one is inspired to transform their life, a vibration of transformation is created for everyone, everywhere. We are all connected, all intuitive, all powerful and when we understand how to powerfully co-create our reality into the world of our dreams, we empower ourselves and everyone to do so.